The First Week Check-In (When Survival Mode Didn’t Read the Calendar)
One week into 2026 and somehow the collective vibe online is already:
“I’m behind.”
“I failed my resolutions.”
“Why don’t I feel different yet?”
If you’re reading this thinking same — welcome. You’re not broken. You’re human.
The internet loves to joke that “2026 is my year.”
But here’s the truth no one puts on a vision board:
👉 Time changes. Patterns don’t — not automatically.
And definitely not just because the calendar flipped.
❄️ Survival Mode Didn’t Expire at Midnight
I live in Sweden.
It’s dark. It’s cold. And this week winter showed up with almost a meter of snow — chaos, silence, isolation, the whole package.
I’ve mostly been hibernating.
Bed. Robe. Blanket. Candles. Cat.
If healing had an aesthetic right now, mine would be:
cozy vampire with Wi-Fi.
And part of me loves the stillness.
But another part of me knows the difference between rest and disappearing.
The cardio bike that once saved me?
Collecting dust.
Sleep schedule?
Completely feral — nighttime overthinking, daytime crashing.
Meals whenever. Movement optional. Time irrelevant.
Not because I don’t know better.
But because my nervous system has been running on survival mode for years.
👉 When you’ve lived too long in survival, stillness doesn’t feel safe — it feels suspicious.
🧠 Knowing Better vs. Doing Better
This is the part we don’t talk about enough.
I talk about healing.
Creativity.
Growth.
Leveling up your selfie.
And yet… behind the scenes, there are days I feel like a fraud.
Not because I’m lying — but because I’m still living what I’m teaching.
Here’s the truth:
Awareness doesn’t cancel burnout.
Insight doesn’t override exhaustion.
Self-sabotage doesn’t always look dramatic.
Sometimes it looks like:
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staying up too late
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avoiding routines that once helped
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numbing instead of nourishing
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promising yourself “tomorrow”
And then feeling ashamed for looping again.
But I’m learning something important:
👉 Self-sabotage is often self-protection that’s gone outdated.
It’s not weakness.
It’s a nervous system that doesn’t feel safe yet.
💔 When Love Doesn’t Fix the Pattern
I made a big emotional decision recently.
Not from clarity — but from love, exhaustion, and loneliness mixed together.
And that combination can blur your boundaries without you realizing it.
Here’s what I’m sitting with right now:
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Love doesn’t heal nervous system wounds
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Commitment doesn’t replace communication
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And reassurance is not a luxury — it’s a need
If you’re constantly calming yourself because someone else goes quiet…
If you’re told to “just trust” while your body spirals…
If you’re shrinking your needs to keep the peace…
That’s not alignment.
That’s self-abandonment wearing a romantic costume.
I don’t have all the answers yet.
But I do know this:
👉 Being chosen once is not the same as being chosen daily.
And secrecy — even when unintentional — still costs something.
✨ So How Do We Shift the Energy Without Gaslighting Ourselves?
Not with hype.
Not with forcing positivity.
And definitely not with “quantum leap” pressure.
You can’t leap from burnout.
You regulate first.
Instead of asking:
“How do I become my best self?”
Try asking:
“What would make my system feel safer today?”
One meal.
One walk.
One boundary.
One honest conversation.
One moment of rest that isn’t numbing.
That’s not falling behind.
That’s rebuilding trust with yourself.
👉 Your worth is not measured by how fast you recover.
📸 The Selfie Healing Moment
This week, take a selfie.
Not for Instagram.
Not to prove you’re okay.
Not to document success.
Take it to witness where you are.
No filter.
No fixing.
No performing.
And instead of asking “How do I look?”
Ask:
“What do I need right now?”
The version of you that’s tired, confused, grieving, or uncertain
doesn’t need to be fixed.
She needs to be seen.
🤍 A Gentle Closing
If 2026 didn’t magically fix your life in seven days —
you’re not late.
You’re not failing.
You’re not doing it wrong.
This year doesn’t need to be loud.
It needs to be honest.
🎧 Listen to Episode 53 of Level Up Your Selfie wherever you get your podcasts.
As Always Extra RainbOH!w Sparkles & Good Vibes OH!nly ✨🦄💦🌈
/ Angelina Mi Lajki
